The phrase “midlife crisis” conjures up cliché images like sports cars, drastic career shifts, and existential dread. However, according to psychologist and author Dr. Marny Lishman, that stereotype misses the mark.

“Instead of one big crisis, it’s often lots of little ones,” Dr. Marny explained during her recent conversation with Doug on Table Talk. “A lot is happening in middle age. We’re constantly reacting to change.”

Middle age isn’t a single year. For some, it begins in their 30s and stretches well into their 70s. It’s a decades-long season filled with change and challenge.

47.2: The Age of Discontent?

Studies show that life satisfaction tends to dip around the age of 47.2. “That’s when life feels the most emotionally complex. There’s often a period of discontent.”

That discontent, however, isn’t necessarily a bad thing. It can be a helpful signal. “Don’t dismiss discontent,” she said. “It’s telling you something. Those feelings are valuable messengers.”

So Much Happens at Once

Midlife often brings overlapping demands, such as career changes, children leaving home, aging parents, and health issues. “We’re raising kids, working full-time, and caring for elderly parents all at once,” said Dr. Marny. “The mental load of the modern adult is massive.”

She encourages people to listen to their feelings, rather than suppress them. “It might not be unhappiness. You might just be so overloaded that you’re not living the life you want.”

Listen, Reflect, and Act

Rather than powering through, Dr. Lishman encourages people to pause and pay attention.

“Our emotions are chemical messengers,” she said. “They show us what’s working and what isn’t. Listen to them, and then do something about it.”

That might mean carving out rest, seeking support, or even booking a doctor’s appointment.

Consider the Possibilities

Dr. Marny advocates for curiosity during midlife. “Stop and reflect. Think about what your life could look like. Ask yourself: what else is possible?”

She often meets people who enter adulthood following someone else’s script. “Middle age can be the time you start writing your own,” she said. “Try new things. Be curious. Many people find a new, better path.”

From Discontent to Contentment

In her book Crisis to Contentment, Dr. Marny outlines a key mindset shift: from “only” to “not only.” “There will be times in life when we are alone,” she said. “But being alone doesn’t have to mean being lonely.”

She encourages people to get comfortable with solitude while also staying connected to the community. “Make sure you’re part of something bigger than yourself. Have people around who support you and who you can support too.”

Start Small, Start Now

Dr Marny’s advice for anyone feeling stuck in midlife is simple but powerful. “Break your life into areas like relationships, career, health, hobbies. Ask yourself: where do I feel content? Where don’t I? Then, step into that. Take action.”

Middle age might feel overwhelming, but it’s also an opportunity to reset. As Dr. Marny puts it, “This can be the beginning of the best part of your life.”

Listen to the full conversation below.