Many of us have been hurt by someone and it is not always easy to forgive.
Pastor Chrissy Lee from Nations Church joined Bec and Morro on Drive to discuss some ways that may help us on the journey of forgiveness.
She began by acknowledging that forgiveness isn’t easy.
“We’ve been hurt by people in our world, little things, big things, some so big, you’re like, how on earth am I ever going to recover from that? And I think forgiveness in those instances can seem almost impossible.”
Forgiving People
The call for Christians is to be forgiving people, according to what it says in the bible.
For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.
Mathew 6:14-15
“So that really turns us over to the question, how on earth do we do that? You know, if our hearts are a bit broken and struggling in hurt.”
Chrissy said that in her own life, the more she has grown in her relationship with God, the more she has grown in her capacity to forgive people who have hurt her.
“I had to really humbly acknowledge that holding on to unforgiveness really wasn’t helping me. If anything, holding on to that unforgiveness was probably hurting me more and perpetuating some of those hurts inside of me because it certainly wasn’t making the hurtful experience go away.”
Chrissy said it was stealing her peace, mental energy and ability to trust people.
Swallowing Poison
She was encouraged by a quote that said:
“Holding on to unforgiveness is like swallowing poison and expecting someone else to die.”
“That was true for me, you know, like the main person my unforgiveness was hurting was actually me. When I acknowledged that, it was a good moment.”
Jesus is Healer
Chrissy reminded us that in moments like that, Jesus is the bestb healer.
“No matter what the wound, no matter what’s happening in or happened to our lives, he has the capacity to heal those places. So often we get into trouble because we look to people, like they are the source of healing this wound inside of me.”
She explained that people are broken and hurting in some way and we want them to acknowledge the pain they have caused us and show deep remorse.
“That’s what we think it’ll take us to heal, if someone apologises and acknowledges the hurt they’ve caused.”
Chrissy said that during her time pastoring people, she has learned that looking to people for that is unsatisfactory.
“No person can fully give you what your broken heart needs. What your broken heart needs is a healer and Jesus is a healer. There’s not a rejection, there’s not a betrayal, you know, there’s not an abandonment, but if you fully open up your heart to him, that he actually doesn’t have the capacity to come in and heal that.”
Look to the Cross
“Jesus has healed me in just untold ways, I’ve had to look to the cross over and over again.”
Chrissy said when she looks to the cross, she remembers how much she’s been forgiven by Jesus.
“My mistakes, the way I’ve hurt people, my arrogance, thoughtlessness and selfishness. When I look to the cross I remember Jesus voluntarily died on that cross to forgive me for all of it. He didn’t deserve that and I definitely didn’t deserve that forgiveness and I can’t repay it.”
Chrissy said because of this reminder and how much she’s been forgiven of her mistakes, it becomes harder for her to hold onto the mistakes of others.
“When I see Jesus’ forgiveness of me, I’ve got to ask myself that question, how can I not release forgiveness to others?”
Beautiful Liberty
“Looking for the cross has really helped me. You come up with, ‘You broke me, but I choose to release you froym that.’ When you do that, not only do you forgive them, but you just set yourself free. It’s beautiful.”
Check out the full chat with Pastor Chrissy Lee below.